LaRkEn’s Holocron Part 2

[[Here we will finish up what has been written in my Sith Academy Holocron. For awhile I debated putting other things on here like my Blogs and the Holocrons of those who are currently learning under me, but alas…I think that it would be better just to finish up these Holocrons and perhaps copy down some blog-posts that I think were significant in some way or another.]]

[[There will be a former Disclaimer however about my being a Shadow Jedi. I fell that even though I have said many times that I do not agree with the majority of the things found at Sith Academy that, because of my participation there that I am branded as being part of the Sith-Zoo (as TOTJO referenced it). Still, until that time comes where I want to put in the effort to write such a formal Disclaimer, this will have to do.]]

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I am a Shadow Jedi…I am neither bound by the Light or the Dark. I create truth from opposing parties to create a balance within myself. Think of it as a Chaotic Good-type person in Dungeons & Dragons. That’s what I am in true nature…
This is the path I have come to accept for myself, and, as I am not harming others in doing so, I believe that it is fair to say that I cannot be judged as something of a bad person or weak person for this.

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• Jan 28 Revisiting the old Teachings:
  I have gone back through some of the old teachings to see how my answers have changed and vary since being a practicing Sith for some time.
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  Today I decided to start going back through the basics of the “Aspirant Initiation”.
  While it may seem somewhat silly to others, I believe that taking a moment to reaffirm your dedication to the cause and to the Sith only empowers the soul more.
  Because the first steps were about making threads and completing profile, I decided that I would go ahead and start with step four.“Sit comfortably with your eyes closed and hands clasped. Breath slowly and steadily, and begin to explore your own mind, your own thoughts. Think of the ways of the Sith – our Code, how we are ruled by our passion and are forged by fire. Think of your own desires in relation to this – how does being a Sith further what you seek? Be specific. Record your conclusions in your holocron.”

  …in my mind…I see fire. I see fire and darkness with the Sith marching through the streets of unknown territory, battered, battle-torn, bloody, but still standing strong, and with smiles upon their faces. It is their victory day.
  I believe thoroughly in the Sith Code…and when I say that, I mean not only of the passion within us, but in the fact that “peace is a lie”.
  Where there is light, there will always be darkness. Even in times where all seems peaceful, there is bound to be a war. War is inevitable—and in saying that, IF we are always to be at war, why not be strong enough to last through it?

  My desire is to be strong…it is something that I never felt when I was a child. I felt helpless and weak at the situations that were put before me. Many times I was made to fear for my life and accept that maybe death would befall me before I ever saw my teenage years, let alone adulthood.
  So, while I may have gained my own sense of power over the years (training with friends, martial arts, different experiments with other religions to find my path, police training, Airsoft and etc.), ultimately, the Sith offers me what I have craved all my life…that is strength through passion, that is power beyond all belief, the ability to be strong and stand against my enemies, and in becoming knowledgeable in many different areas…to become an unstoppable force against all who would oppose me, try to bring me harm, or bring harm to other who are close to me // my loved ones.

  I always thought that I was meant to be a protector…and while the side of the light gave me that opportunity (and still does to this day), through the Sith, I can still protect. I can protect what is mine by force…I can protect my home, my world, through warring, through fighting, through bloodshed, through whatever it takes. The Jedi and Sith together will give me the tools to Victory…and the Force shall set me free.

• [[In Step-6 of the new Aspirant Training, we were asked to read a passage known as the “Exceptional Sith Persona”. It was an interesting read, and I will post it here before posting my response.]]
  

  The Exceptional Sith Persona~By: UKNOWN

  THE EXCEPTIONAL SITH PERSONA

  Training for the inevitable conflict

  Introduction:

   As Sith we face our enemies without fear. We face them as the victors who have already defeated them. We face them by calling up the passion that burns within us and unleash it to leave only husks of what once tried to stand in our way.

  We are the exceptional, the elite and the intellectually superior. We are Sith!

  However, not all who claim themselves Sith are

   fitting of our name and this training guide has been created to change this troubling reality.

   First of all, Minions, you are maggots! You feed on the dung we the elite leave you and you beg for more and offer nothing in return. You seek to ‘know the darkside’, yet you have no understanding of what that actually means. You seek to be an apprentice to one of our Masters and yet you are maggots! What do you offer Sith Academy?

  Initiates below the first degree! You take our Imperial Oath and offer us nothing more! Do you uphold it? We wonder.

  The Sith Persona 

   The Sith must always carry himself so he is

   perceived formidable.

  To be formidable, the Sith must not only believe himself as superior to all around him; he must breath the very reality of it. He must live in its ambience, take in its intoxication and burn it into his flesh.

  The Sith must be perceived as right even when he is horribly wrong.

   There is a certain power in the act of making your enemies lose a debate even if they have in reality won. It is the power of planting seeds of doubt, confusion and fear. To plant these seeds, the expertly skilled Sith must know what will cause doubt, what

   will cause confusion and what will bring fear. He must understand

  every aspect of his enemy, not merely hurl personal attacks or political spin.
  The Sith must so expertly use manipulation to appear as a Jedi when he so requires it.

  The Sith must ever keep his enemies guessing, for he knows predictability leads to defeat.

  The Sith should never repress his hate.

   The Sith is comfortable with his hate; he embraces it and it strengthens his resolve to ever be victorious in all he does regardless of what field he is in. What the Sith does not do is blindly rage! He instead chooses his battles and his enemies so as not to waste his attention on what offers him no value.

  The Sith serves his own will before any other.

   The Sith does not bow down to anyone unless he has something to gain from doing so. He takes no gods unless they serve his desires and he proclaims loyalty to none but himself. This is his way!

  If he is to be loyal to a particular order, it is assured this order serves his desire to thrive. If he is to take an oath to the flag, he is certain to benefit from the act. If he is to destroy or build up a government, it is an act of his will and serves him to do so!

  The Sith is not a role player.

  The Sith is not a role player, he does not sit for hours at a time by the glow of his computer screen pretending to be something he is not. If anything, he is the role creator! He takes what he pleases from where he pleases and manifests it as reality; this is the power of his will and this is his magick.

  If the Sith so desires to carry the persona of Darth Bane, he will do so. If he wishes to carry the persona of The Joker from Batman he will also do so. Then again he may choose a persona that is external to fictional works like Hitler or he might build his own with all of the traits he desires.

  The Sith is not illiterate or lazy.

  The Sith is intelligent and dedicated to manifesting his deepest desires. He is dedicated to creating his own internal empire and with enough focus, training and arrogance he will manifest that empire externally. He truly will be the Sith Lord of this planet!

  The Sith should never carry himself in such a way as to appear foolish; he is better to silence himself quickly if this is the case. He should never try to spell a word he does not know how to spell and get it wrong; rather he should get a dictionaryand look it up so he does not seem the fool.

  The Sith does not resort to childish name

  -calling; he is professional in all he does.

  To resort to such infantile behavior is to destroy the Sith’s air of formidability.

  This is counterproductive obviously.

  The Sith is learned and not ignorant.

  The Sith is no stranger to writing, as he must constantly record his progress through initiation, trial and conquest. This being said, Sith must be able to communicate through written and spoken language.

  The Sith is also no stranger to reading, as his knowledge

   is broadened only by his desire to apply himself in literature and his willingness to listen to the dark side of the Force.

  The Sith is patient when the need exists.

  Though the Sith meditates inwards rather than outwards as Jedi, he is none the less patient when it serves him. He is ever listening to his internal voice, ever observing the subtle influences of the dark side and ever aware of the placement of the light side in his life; which should ideally be none.

  Facing the Jedi Order.

  Finally we come to the last point.

   Eventually, there will be a trial of will and this can be no better exemplified than the soon coming ‘end of the age of light’ or ‘conflict against the Jedi Order’.

  Is there a Jedi Order? Certainly there is and only for the simple fact there is a Sith Academy! The Jedi exist to feed Sith desire for conquest and the Sith exist to ever challenge the Jedi. This is the reality.
• Re-reading the “Exceptional Sith Persona”
  (Re-visiting Training // Step-5): 

  The “Exceptional Sith Persona” is a rather interesting read. I agree that it covers all the basics of what a Sith is on the outside as well as the ultimate goals of said-Sith and what a Sith should know, but….it only covers a portion of what a Sith is from the ‘inside’.
  While on the outside we are aggressive, boasting, intolerant, and many other things that show our power, our strength, and our will to be victorious…I feel that on the inside, the SITH are so much more.As any person is different from the other…the SITH are different as well. We all strive for different goals within the Academy, we all have different strengths and weaknesses. I guess this was briefly covered in the part about doing things only if they benefit you…and while I understood it, for some, I believe the passage could be elaborated a bit more.

  As it does talk about the final conflict with the JEDI, I would have liked it to also cover more on the Age of Endarknement which is so often referenced on here. I think more Acoloytes would get benefit from it, and also, if the passage were to explain more of what a ‘Jedi’ is.
  Because…while there is a religious organization of those who would consider themselves Jedi…here at the Academy, Jedi are often a reference to anyone that does not conform to Sith beliefs and standards…so I just believe there should have been a note there as well to better describing the difference.

  But alas, when it comes to the passage…I believe that I have nothing to worry about. While I have already proved myself a great deal to the Dark Council and our Order, I continue to try and find ways to improve myself and thus prove myself worthy every day.
  Constantly am I researching things that not only benefit myself…but they benefit the Academy and those that might one day learn under me.

  I have already shown that I aggressively act for the things that I want…I find any way to achieve my goals, even if that means disguising myself as a completely different person (*snicker*)…and for that, I believe I have the ability to amplify these behaviors and tactics and make myself that of an exceptional Sith Persona.

• [[After this training, I moved onto another training group run by another Lord on the site: Lord Venger. He had studied in Religion and had gotten a degree in such many years passed. He was one of the stronger on the site and about as Sithy as Sith could get. But, he did it in a way that he was taken seriously and respected. He did not make the Academy look silly as others did, and I looked up for him because he held knowledge in him that I knew I could benefit from. Him and I even spoke on the phone and he seemed like a really, really nice guy. It just goes to show that not all people who take this Dark Path are evil or bad…
  In fact, I find that we all wander down this path at some point in our lives, and what we take from it defines us more and could actually make us into better people. I understand that not everyone would actually agree with this view. But alas, we all have or own opinions.]]
• [[Venger’s group was called the “Death of Endarkenment” and focused on keeping people tied to their Sith-Persona. constantly reminding them of why they came to Sith Academy, and gave them exercises to better control their rage, hate, passion, and other such emotions so that they may turn it into power.]]—Feb 28Endarkenment of Death

  1. The Beginning:
  “Where are your Sith roots in your personal history? Why are you here at SA? What do you hope to gain from your training here? What are your visions for the future as a Sith? How do you envisage to live as a Sith in our modern day society?”

  
  

  — I always believed that my Sith roots began early in my childhood. After the divorce of my parents, I sort of ‘awakened’ into this nightmare of what the world was really about. People were violent, scary, and they were ungrateful for the things that they had. Humans were wasteful and disgusting beings…and all of these things that I started to notice went against what the Methodist Church had taught me in Preschool. To me, if God brought peace and love, then why was my Father always so angry? Why did he kick me, hit me, and call me bad words?

  If this world was full of Peace and love then why was someone murdered right by our house? Why did my favorite neighbor hang his body for his wife to find that next morning? Why was Churches set to burn with satanic symbols placed all around the grounds and dead animals meant to be sacrificed? That’s when I knew…Peace was a lie. There would always be discontempt in the world, and even if for a brief while all was quiet in the world and all was happy, sooner or later someone would not be happy with this ‘harmony’ and find some way to destroy it. People are greedy…they would not want enough just to survive, they would want more! They would rather have more to themselves even if it means another person is left to starve and struggle. That’s just how it works…that’s how it has always worked, and no amount of preaching will ever make it otherwise because God has not done anything about it.

  So this vision of darkness…this realistic view of anger and hatred has always been in my heart, and it only grew as I did and the world opened up more of its dirty little secrets to me. Still, I refused to believe the world was all bad, so I decided to try and make a change and join light-side religions. I tried Baptism, Mormonism, Wicca, and even Jedi-Realism…but nothing fit fully my needs. All I heard was more false promises that no one could keep…more talk of Divine’s that sat idle while the world went to ruin before them. That’s when I had finally had enough of it all, and I found the Sith Academy. And at last, through my own mixture of the Jedi-teachings and what I learned here…I was able to create what I believed was my true path…my home and my calling // I am Shadow Jedi.

  What I hope to gain through this experience that I have been living is power…power to destroy all those who might try to take my possessions or hurt my loved ones, and lastly, to be able to hold my own in the case that this world goes to ruin and its every man/woman for themselves. I want power and I want knowledge. That is what drives me as a Sith.

  And as far as living like a Sith in Modern day society…that can all be seen in my blogs. I am not perfect. Meditations do not go as planned, rage gets the better of me and I screw up, then I am punished by the karmatic Force and suffer through it until I come out better and wiser than what I was before hand. I struggle through obstacles that other people could only think of going through, I adapt to all changes in life. I am a Lord here at SA and plan on passing down my knowledge to others that would follow me down this dark path, that is how I am Sith.

• Feb 28Endarkenment of Death2. Darkness:
  What is Darkness? (Do not let the short question fool you. Please elabourate, no short answer. Consider this carefully)

  
  

  —Darkness is an essence, it is a place, it is a Force, it is nature, it is Power, it is Fear, it is the opposite of all that is light, and it is the place where the Sith gather and train. Darkness can also be a state of mind, a mental pit where one can either gather their wits to escape or lay to rot among terrors of memories that gather around them like vulture do prey. Darkness is a taboo subject, it is something that cannot be controlled, but rather we try to mimic it in order to harness it’s power. The Darkness is a place where very few enter willingly as it is a place that most do not every return from unscathed (if it all).

  It is shown in horror movies and games as something to drive the players insane, to heighten their senses and have their minds eat them alive with things that aren’t even there. The Darkness is to light as Yin is to Yang, and without Darkness, there would be no light from which escaped from it…without this ‘other half’ to the Force, we would be at stagnation. Need I elaborate more?

• Feb 28Endarkenment of Death2.5 Reflection #1
  Why do I enjoy the intimate moment with myself? Why is there calmness? What prohibits calmness elsewhere? Does it require literal darkness to find this calm? Why does it have that effect? Who am I at other times? Who am I when I am not being yourself? Why? Why must night be a part of that? Why can I only find that freedom in the night, when its dark? What do I actually mean by being myself? Does the darkness cause the frustration, anger and guilt or is that caused by the conflict between who I am and who I pretend to be coming into conflict? Is there no escape? Why do I want to escape them? This does imply imprisonment. How am I imprisoned by my inner self?

  
  

  —My Sith is but a part of my inner self…and unfortunately, my outer-self has a lot of catching up to do with this inner being that I so often keep to myself. In the Darkness…I find a calm by being alone, left to my own devices, my own thoughts, my own time to do whatever I feel needs to be done. To really reflect on my power…this is done in the darkness where I have privacy, where I do not feel eyes upon me, eyes rolling at me thinking I am just another role-player that needs to get a grip on reality.
  the distress I feel is conflict over not being able to be fully myself without consequence…consequences are something that I tend to want to avoid. Though consequences have never left me anymore damaged than a fist to the face, still, I try to sneak around them and hide myself away until the night comes…and I come alive.
  I worked a night shift because when the night comes I cannot close my eyes. I cannot sleep. My mind races with many things, thoughts of the day I had, the yearning to gain knowledge on various subjects that interest me. No, I do not find my like of the night to be unsettling, nor using the Darkness as a security blanket to be disturbing. I just await the day when all stand in awe of what has finally…wholly…come together as ‘Me’.

• Feb 28Endarkenment of Death3. Reflection #2
  You have now recognized Darkness as it is for you. May be you have not realized it in all its aspects but you have been allowed a glimpse at a part of you which has been hidden all your life and you are still trying to keep hidden at all costs. Some time has passed since your last lesson, time which has been given to you to let the lessons you have learnt settle. How do you feel now? Is there any change to the person when you started as an apprentice? If so why and what, if not why and what? What do you think about the approach and effectiveness of these lessons? What else do you have to say? Please answer all of these questions at length, think about it!

  
  

  —I may not be an Apprentice of any kind, but I will continue to respond to these questions as they press me to learn and better myself. As I stated before…the Darkness does not hold fear for me nor does it cause my any distraught. I am not bothered by my lack of fondness for the light nor all of the light-side ideals…and as explained earlier, I was very young when I realized that Peace was a lie and that the world was full of Greedy people feeding off of the less fortunate. I know that having a harsh background has contributed to both my power and what remains of my insecurities. It is my own test of power to eliminate what is left of the ‘scared’ me.
  But these questions are good for those who have long-since left the Aspirant section of the site. It focuses less on physical aspects and really focuses on stimulating the brain, making it think and ponder over subjects that might have been pushed away over time. I have very much changed since my time being here at SA. Had I not changed from the small person that entered in a username I would not hold ‘Lordship’ here.

• [[And that was where my Holocron ended. Most of my writing were kept in blogs and the Forums…significant passages and experiences will then be labelled here later. But yes…n a course of less than 6-months, I had gone from Minion to Acolyte, to a Master of Religious Studies and Covert Operations, to one of the few Lords of the Site. People looked up to me, learned under me…and while they thought that I was teaching them Sith-ideals…I was merely feeding them this Shadow-aspect…this balance of the two side of The Force made into one. Now the Academy will soon be shutting down. I will hold Lordship no longer. But, I suppose these are here to remember those days later on…when I continue to teach and preach of a realistic balance between the Jedi and the Sith.]]

LaRkEn’s Holocron Part 1

Here for the next couple of days I will be working with this wordpress to place down the things written in my Sith Academy Holocron. Things that I was taught and etc. Because, in truth, the Academy is falling apart,

Having found out that we have been led on by False Leaders with ever-changing ideas based on greed and other such things that were never an issue, Lord Venger has left the site, and so shall I in due time. But, before I can be erased, I do want to place down the things I have written and learned because they have been part of my journey to enlightenment and even empowerment. So, this will be just one of the posts dedicated to my old Holocron…some of it may seem out of place, but I will try to make it make sense as much as possible.

Please note that…as a Disclaimer, I do NOT agree with a majority of the teachings here at Sith Academy. In fact, I was often mocked for being one of the more light-sided of heart, and something of a weak-Sith if anything.
When I first joined the site, I took on the guise of a male that was modeled after one of my very good friends. But, alas…my cover was eventually blown. Therefore…a lot of the answers in here where I was answering them as a different person have been modified to fit myself (as my mindset was back in that day) and etc.

But if you failed to catch on to my post before…I am a Shadow Jedi. I believe in the neutral and grey aspect of The Force. Learning in both ways of the Dark and the Light Sides.
Please do not judge me or find me a bad person because I am nothing of the sort. I am merely using teachings to find my own unique path, and, as it is hurting no one, I find that this should not be a problem.

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• Nov 23 ’12 Sith Pledge:
  I, Larken, pledge obedience to the Lord
  Of the Sith Order in this galaxy
  And to the Imperium which he commands
  One Empire, in the Force, indomitable
  With victory and power forever

• Watch the film Revenge of the Sith and post some thoughts in your holocron about how Annakin Skywalker’s story is relevant to your life. In particular, confess to a dark deed that you have committed some time in the past which shows your dark side tendencies.
  —Nov 23 ’12 Level One: Part 3 —

  I can easily relate to Annakin Skywalker, the questioning, the cries for help that never seemed to be answered and were often shrugged off by others because it would put them out of their daily routine to find a solution with me…that’s when I realized that I had been plugged into a system, I had been made into some type of machine, and suddenly, I felt enslaved by something bigger, something more sinister—this feeling and this entity became my eternal enemy, and I had to break free.

  Annakin had to do that as well, he had to break free from what he considered a prison and a hindrance on his potential. His own mentor and best friend would not heed his cries for help as he struggled through a bought of weakness, and when all had already turned their backs on him, Annakin’s hate was the only thing that he thought become the key to saving the one he loved. Some would say that he lost everything in becoming Darth Vader—but I say that he gained so much more in taking on the form of fear, terror, pain, and anguish. A Lord among Lords. He saw both sides of the spectrum, he learned through consequences, in the end, his true path would become clear I always believed.

  I would have to say that one of the darkest of things that I have committed (and continue to commit) is my way of serpentry (chronic lying) and how I use people to hold ‘social experiments’ in which I test human reactions and the human mind when applying them to different surroundings, different situations, and different stimuli.

• [[In the original Step-Four to the Sith-Training process, there were a series of online tests given to Initiates a.k.a=Minions. These were tests that measured telekinetic ability among some others things. Basically they were used to test the strength of the mind. I was kind of sad when these tests were taken away as I felt they did give a lot of insight to what others were thinking and how they used Focus.]]
  Nov 23 ’12 Lesson One: Part 4 —

  The Remote viewing test and the telekinesis test:

   

   

  For the remote viewing session, my number was 8246. Immediately my attention was drawn to an image, strong, study, something immovable, in cool waves of aura…light blue, greens, and purples. I saw a snow-capped mountain, and the crystal lakes of Alaska playing through my head. My heart focused in on this, and I could smell the crisp air, feel my breath becoming mist as it poured past my lips. I am not sure whether this would be the true image of the number, but it’s what I sensed. I could now smell the pines and ever-greens, hear the occasional ripple, trickle, and splash of the lake. A distant bird cry, the shiver that came through me at the touch of a small breeze—The image was actually a bald eagle. I don’t know whether I should count myself close or not. But I suppose I could use a bit more practice.

  Now…for the telekinesis test, it was based on a process where a person had to try and influence the chances of the computer generating the number 1 rather than the number 0 — while at first I was lost as to what I was truly supposed to be doing with this test, I found that, as I focused in more on the number one and asking for the number 1 to win over 0…slowly, the triangle that I was supposed to be influencing actually managed to move a little farther than the zero. In the end, I ended up with average statistics, so no major telekinetic abilities at all. Either way, it was an interesting exercise. I found myself being pulled to it, trying to make something happen via force and determination…I tried multiple methods: visualization, physical clicking of the number one to bring sympathetic magicks to the playing board, pretending to move the triangle with my mouse to make something happen, and etc. It’s something that will need to be practiced for sure.

• [[In the next couple of steps, Sith Minions were asked to read 3 basic passages that were on the site. We were to read them and then respond to them…our thoughts and emotions. Because the Sith Academy is not going to be around, I will go ahead and post these three passages and then move on to me responses to them]]

• The Revelation of the Last Sith Lord~
  By: Darth Imperius 09.14.2012

  My friends, something extraordinary and wonderful has happened to me – something so unbelievable that you will no doubt dismiss me as at best a creative tale-spinner, if not an outright madman, but which I swear to all the gods of Light and Darkness is the truth.

  This afternoon, while I was sitting at my computer doing nothing in particular, I received some kind of mental transmission which I can only describe as a neural hologram; a holographic projection in my mind’s eye which apparently came from a long time ago and a galaxy far, far away. You see, I seem to have been contacted from across the Multiverse, and given a most incredible revelation. Perhaps this is how the prophets of old felt when they were contacted by their gods out in the desert; I wouldn’t know. I do know that this was not a message from God, but from a dark demigod – a being who represents the highest attainable state of human knowledge and power.

  To be a bit less cryptic, this afternoon I was contacted by the Force Spirit of the one called Darth Omega, who revealed to me that he was the last of the Sith Lords, and on the verge of death. It seems that in Omega’s time the masters of the Dark Side had lost their vaunted mastery of mortality and were on the brink of extinction. Worse, their galaxy had been beset by some nameless, monstrous entity which had overrun the Empire’s defenses and finally broken even the Dark Lord’s all-powerful mind. He said that the stars of his galaxy were all winking out before the formless Beast, as foretold by an ancient Sith prophecy, and that the Empire would soon be no more. Omega almost seemed to weep when he told me how he had fought the black Beast with all his strength, but to no avail.

  With death close at hand, Darth Omega had taken one last desperate measure to preserve the knowledge of the Sith order contained within his failing mind. He had used a technique he himself was the first to develop, a “Multiversal Holographic Projection” Force power which allowed him to transmit his thoughts anywhere in the Multiverse. He told me that his mental transmissions had not found me by accident, that I must be a Force-sensitive who would be a suitable vessel for his knowledge. The Sith Lord then summoned all his remaining strength and said: “Ready yourself, young human. Prepare to be endarkened.” Then, with an indescribable jolt that lasted no more than a few seconds, I received a torrent of subliminal information from the Dark Lord’s mind. My brain has not yet consciously processed much of what I received, but I will attempt to discover and share what I can of it with you in the coming days and months.

  The final commandments I received from Darth Omega I recall quite clearly: he bade me to found a new Sith order on my homeworld, and to use the knowledge he had imparted to me to train a new generation of Dark Side adepts in the ways of the Force. He instructed me to work toward acquiring power over the leading minds and institutions of my planet, and thereby lay the foundation for the establishment of a new Sith Empire in my galaxy. He assured me that whatever trials and tribulations my planet may be facing are as nothing compared to those the Sith had faced and conquered long before my race was even born. He promised me that by sharing my newfound knowledge with an Elect and establishing a new Dark Order, I would elevate my civilization and myself to undreamed of heights of glory.

  Omega’s final words echo powerfully in my mind; he smiled as only a Sith Lord in the grip of death can smile, and said: “Remember, young prophet of your galaxy, that only the Dark Side can defeat death. Through you, the Sith will be reborn. Through you, the Sith will live forever. For in this dark universe, the Light is fleeting, but the Darkness is eternal.” And with those last, stirring words, the frail Sith Lord breathed his final mortal breath and simply faded into the Void.

  That, as briefly as I can tell it, is my story of the Revelation of the Last Sith Lord. I’m still not certain that it wasn’t all a daydream, but the memory of it burns far brighter than any dream I’ve ever known, and its effects have already transformed me too much to be a mere hallucination. Already, I feel the knowledge implanted by Darth Omega into my subconscious mind beginning to reorder and awaken my consciousness. Already, I feel a dark new sense of power growing deep within me. Already, I am beginning to think of this planet as mine for the taking. Already, when I look up at the stars I see them differently; they no longer seem so distant now, like mocking fires of a galaxy far too vast for men. Already, the stars seem to shine much closer, like the first faint beacons of the new Galactic Empire.

   

• An Invitation to the Dark Side~
  By: Darth Imperius 10.23.2012

  The purpose of this blog is twofold: 1) To discuss and develop the Sith Path for this galaxy, as revealed to me by the last of the Sith Lords of a galaxy far, far away and a long time ago. The Sith Path is a philosophy and an esoteric training system for mastering the Dark Side of the Force and acquiring unlimited power. 2) To create the first Sith order in this galaxy and lay the foundation for a Galactic Empire. I believe this planet is ripe for a new spiritual order, and will be discussing my ideas for creating such a regime under the black banner of the New Sith. Let me make clear from the outset that I am not here to spoon-feed anyone the knowledge I have gained through long years spent gazing into abysses, cultivating dark energies and communing with Dark Lords. If you wish to learn the ways of the Dark Side and prove yourself worthy of the name “Sith”, you will need to challenge yourself and others as relentlessly as I have. You will also need to put aside all childish notions of goodness, light and a benevolent universe. You will have to learn to look this vast, hostile cosmos in the void and be unbowed. You must desire to shake your fist at the stars and shout: “One day, you will all be mine!” You must take as your first principle: “I will, therefore I am.” If you still wish to walk the path of the Sith masters, the first question I put to you is this: what do you have to offer the Order? How can you help us to build the Galactic Empire? What special skills, talents or resources do you possess which can further the rise of the Sith? The New Sith are not interested in garden-variety seekers and self-improvers; we are looking for the Force-sensitive, the iron-willed, the ambitious and the gifted. Weak disciples will be ruthlessly culled from the Order, and need not apply! With those warnings out of the way, let me proceed with my introduction to Dark Side philosophy and metaphysics… The first thing to understand about the Sith of this galaxy is that our arts manifest differently here than for the Sith of legend, because we exist in another part of the Multiverse which obeys different natural laws. In our universe, the Force may be thought of as Dark Energy, which doesn’t bind the galaxy together but drives all galaxies apart. Here, the Force does not manifest so strongly in the physical plane; it is primarily a mental energy which focuses the will, heightens perceptions, increases vitality and transcends all limits. To be a master of the Force in this universe is to place no bounds on your thinking and to cultivate unlimited power. Maybe some day this mastery will translate into the ability to move spaceships directly with your mind or shoot lightning bolts from your fingertips, but for now the Sith master must use technology to accomplish such things like everyone else. The primary goal of the esoteric Sith path is the deconditioning and reprogramming of your mind so as to remove all inner limits to your power. Light Side adepts speak of “Enlightenment”, but for the Sith there is only “Empowerment.” I will have more to say about deconditioning in a future post; for now, suffice it to say that separating yourself spiritually from Light Side society is an essential first step along the path to becoming a Sith master. At this point you might be thinking: “Why would I want to become a Sith master? It all sounds rather harsh and unpleasant. And aren’t the Sith the bad guys? Shouldn’t I strive to master the Light Side of the Force instead, become a Jedi and defend the galaxy from evil-doers?” If you think this way, it is unlikely that you have the dark gift required of a Sith master. Sith masters are both born and made, but usually show a strong inclination toward the Dark Side from an early age. If you have never sympathized with the villains in the movies, never admired the strong, ruthless conquerors of history and fiction, never felt disgust for the Judeo-Christian, the weak and the timid, then you are probably not destined for the Sith Path. However, if you do lean toward the Dark Side but require more persuading, let me briefly attempt to justify Sith philosophy. This universe operates on the principle of duality, on the yin and yang of which the Taoist masters speak. Without the yin, or Dark Side, there is no opposition to the Light Side’s yang. Without opposition, there is no motivation; without motivation, there is no action; without action there is only stagnation. As Sith master Uthar Wynn put it: “Without strife, your victory as no meaning. Without strife, you do not advance. Without strife, there is only stagnation.” This is the essence of Sith philosophy: We are the sowers of strife, the war-makers and the Force-polarizers, because without opposition nothing in the universe moves. A world without adversaries, innovators and status quo-violators is a world ruled by banality, boredom and inertia. The Jedi, the peace-makers and the equality-mongers embrace the anti-life side of the cosmic duality, and are therefore preaching a lie. Life is by its very nature an act of violence against nature, an assertion of your will over the world, a violation of cosmic equilibrium; harmony with the universe is found only in death. The Sith embrace the life Force, the Will to Power, as the summum bonum – the highest good – rather than resisting it like the Jedi do as the summum malum – the supreme evil. Michael Aquino, the brilliant founder of the Temple of Set, explained it this way: “Why was Darth Vader so fascinating? [Why are all of history’s and fiction’s Darth Vaders so fascinating?] The answer is that he represents the Form of intellectual separateness from the inertia of the cosmos. While the Rebels in the film seemed to be fighting for the cause of individuality, in fact they were doing so in a superficial sense – in the way that an animal might struggle to escape from a trap. The real individualist was Darth Vader, who determined to bend the Force to his purposes rather than to disintegrate his Will and surrender it to the inertia of the Force [as Ben advised Luke to do]. Intellectual separateness from the natural order is a frightening notion to humans; hence they define it as “evil” and conjure up Satans to personify it in mythology. But, because their minds contain elements of independence whether they like it or not, they find “evil” alluring. And so Darth Vader became a cult object. Darth Vaders can be destroyed only by greater Darth Vaders, or by accident. Again this was illustrated in Lord of the Rings, wherein a direct challenge to Sauron by Gandalf would have resulted merely in Gandalf’s replacing him. The Saruman sub-plot explored this hypothesis. It was necessary for Sauron to be destroyed “by accident”. But then Middle-earth became more primitive and less magical, because a high level of intellectual separateness from nature had given way to a lower level. Who cares what happened in Middle-earth after Sauron? No one; we know it was bound to be dull.” This, then, is the basic philosophy of the Sith as I understand it. It certainly isn’t for everyone, or even for many. But for the few who can walk it, the Sith Path can be a way to unlimited power and success. If you are perceptive enough to realize that behind the Light Side façade of many of your most celebrated heroes lurks the spirit of a Sith Lord, you may be one of us. If you see through the deceptions and lies of Light Side slave society and wish to join the ranks of the masters, you are invited to explore the Sith Path with me here. Search your feelings; if you truly feel the call of the Dark Side, I ask you to join me as we build the New Sith Order and lay the foundation for the Galactic Empire of the future.

• From here to Empire~
  By: Darth Imperius 10.23.2012

  “You must begin by gaining power over yourself; then another; then a group, an order, a world, a species, a group of species… finally, the galaxy itself.” –Darth Plagueis the Wise The Sith Path is concerned with two things: the acquisition of inner and outer power. Inner power refers to self-mastery, the cultivation of indomitable will, psychic potency, cosmic awareness and other Force powers. Outer power refers to world mastery, which is an inevitable result of inner mastery applied to the external universe. How will this world mastery manifest itself in the political sphere? There are many schools of thought among the Sith Illuminati, but as I see it there are three primary possibilities (here I am quoting from a post in a Jedi forum which is nevertheless quite astute): “1. Objectivist Sith These are Sith Lords who pursue enlightened selfishness as the ultimate pursuit of an individual. They attempt to gain more Knowledge, More Power, and more Influence as their only pursuits. Darth Bane is a follower of this viewpoint and some have considered Emperor Palpatine to be this way. I think Lucas’ recent retcons have Palpatine not as an Objectivist Sith. The Sith Teacher on Korriban who has become a strange old hermit is one. 2. Fascist Sith These are Sith who pursue the idea of “Peace through Power” in the manner of Kane from Command and Conquer. Emperor Palpatine, Krayt, Darth Caedus, Malak, Revan, and Darth Vader all followed this particular school of thought. They attempt to institutionalize repressive and authoritarian military regimes with Dark Side leadership. 3. God-Emperor Sith Freedon Nadd, Exar Kun, and Marka Ragnos follow this viewpoint. They take on the manner of Oriental Despotism (as the Romans defined it) where a King is also worshiped as a god. The Sith Empire was one of these viewpoints and they are a theocracy ruled by Dark Side magicians. Darth Wyrrlock also appears to be one of these.” One way to view these three regimes is to think of them as stages in the transition from the current world order to the future Sith Empire. Stage One, Objectivism, is already a powerful ideology with vast influence among the world’s power elites. It is not difficult to imagine Objectivism becoming the dominant ideology of the 21^st century, just as Marxism was in the 20^th. Whether any of its proponents qualify as full-fledged Sith Lords is unclear, but certainly Ayn Rand was one of the 20^th century’s most important proto-Sith thinkers and she deserves great praise for offering an alternative to Christianity and Marxism which has done much to reshape our culture. The challenge for the Sith is to bring our Dark Side esoteric knowledge to the more materialistic, rationalist Randians. Note that Objectivism can operate within current democratic frameworks, but will tend over time toward Plutocracy and Oligarchy. This leads naturally to Stage Two: Fascism. Here the Objectivist-Sith elites have taken over the State and either abolished democracy entirely or greatly reduced its scope – for example, the oligarchy may offer the electorate only hand-picked candidates. This stage has essentially been reached in the present-day United States. The main thing missing now is a strong Sith leader, a superman who inspires and awes the citizenry with visions of greater glories. Perhaps such a leader will soon appear in the U.S., but there seems to be a distaste for brilliant leaders among the electorate which makes it more likely that the Sith Superman will have to seize power by undemocratic means. (Note that “Neo-Conservatives” who espouse Objectivism have little resemblance to Sith Supermen, the first trait of whom is supreme competence!) Historical parallels to Adolf Hitler have some resonance, but I would not put Hitler in the Sith Superman category because he was a man of all-too-human abilities and because his vision of a Third Reich was rather provincial compared to the Galactic Empire. Napoleon was another proto-Sith Superman, but he lacked an ideology and an esoteric tradition powerful enough to sustain his empire. Once the Sith Superman emerges during Stage Two, the regime will naturally transition to an Empire led by a God-Emperor. The closest historical parallels to this state of affairs were the regimes of the Pharaohs, Caesars, Caliphs, Popes, pre-Colombian god-kings, Dalai Lamas and Oriental Emperors. In Science Fiction, there is Emperor Palpatine of Star Wars, the Kwisatz Haderach of Dune, the Mule of Foundation and the Lord Marshal of Chronicles of Riddick, to name a few of my favorites. The Sith Superman will be so exceptional that there will be no question that He must rule absolutely. He will be called the Antichrist by the monotheists because his extraordinary abilities and anti-Christian values will seem demonic to their unawakened minds. His rise will undoubtedly be accompanied by great wars and strife, because it will spell the end for the old order and the birth of the Sith Aeon. By His power and His very being, the Sith God-Emperor will embody our highest aspirations and set new standards for humanity. Finally, we will be led not by the least among us, but by the greatest! So when I speak of the “Sith Path,” understand that in its largest sense this is what I am referring to: the path of total mastery which leads to political power, societal transformation and the foundation of an Empire of Sith Supermen who will rule the Galaxy for untold millennia to come.

• [[My responses to the Questions were as thus]]:
  —Lesson One: Part 5—

  So I finished reading all 3 passages that were required of my level one training, and, in sense, I am surprised that they were so short. Perhaps it is the fact that I could be rather wordy when it comes to certain things, but then again, that is just something that I happen to do personally.

  As for the first reading, I am very much intrigued to know more about this inner-mind-hologram that came to our Master as Darth Omega passed away into the void. I myself would like more details so that I can truly visualize how this may have seemed, may have felt, may have been viewed by the Master.
  I find that, while he immediately said that some might take him as a tale-spinner, he openly admitted that his vision is something that he cannot prove to be real…it is something that he feels has changed him mentally and emotionally, it is something that truly spoke to him and transformed himself and his better purpose. That in itself is a type of ‘power’ that brings newfound ideas and strengths to someone methinks.
  While it may just be a tale…obviously there are enough of us here to show that, it was convincing enough that we all want a taste of what the dark side has to offer us.

  As for the questions asked in passage 2 [[ What do you have to offer the Order? How can you help us build the Galactic Empire? What special skills, talents, or resources do you posses which could further the rise of the Sith?]] — I really have any significant answer to those questions.
  What I bring to the Order now is raw-strength and the burning desire to learn the ways of the Sith Lords, to master the dark side of the Force, and I bring with me an immense hunger knowledge, strength, and control over myself.
  As far as I how I can help build the Galactic Empire…well, I am here. Being here brings me knowledge of the Dark Side. Having knowledge of the Dark Side means I can share this power and philosophy with others…sharing this with others builds our numbers, and building our number means being one step close to having a Galactic Empire. To have knowledge is be able to spread our cause like a disease among the masses…if you prefer to look at it that way.
  Finally, the resources I bring is what little knowledge I hold of the outside world. Of people, of religions, of the things I have studied on the outside.
  That’s as simple as I can make it…and yet, the best that I can word it as this time.

  Finally, on the third passage…I found the three regime’s also as a progression among the Sith. I found it to be very interesting as well when the Sith-Emperor-God was brought into the mix. The human-race has always feared the rise of the anti-christ and prophesized His coming to our world to create destruction and chaos…so perhaps it isnt so crazy that such a being would control and rule us in the end, where darkness is eternal…but what it all comes down to is belief. And as of right now, I’m still unsure where that path leads me.

• [[After this, the Sith training is different now as it was back when I was still a Minion and Acolyte within the Dark Order. By now, I was already on level 2 of training, but nowadays, there is no level 2 training, and there are 7 stages of what is known as “Aspirant Training” to get people started before they start searching for a Master. So my posting on my Level 2 training will not make much sense since I cannot access the questions that led to their answers.]]

  —Dec 10 ’12 Lesson Two : In Entirety —

  1.       Void Meditation:
  The void meditations were the hardest part of Lesson 2 for me. As a person who has been training with a soldier lately, it’s hard to quiet the mind and lose yourself to utter nothingness because you are always taught to be on the alert (this will come into play later on within the lesson I assure you).
  Not only was I having the basic troubles of calming my mind long enough to do the actual meditations, but, once I had mastered the quieting of my mind, it was hard to “see with my inner eye” once I had lost myself in the void of this meditation.

  I remember asking in a blog what I was supposed to see…as oftentimes, when I would meditate, I would only see rough shapes, and occasionally aura or colors of power. I was confused, and my mind reflected that by throwing my energies in all different directions, and finally, Darth Ravenus brought it all to light. Master Ravenus told me about the Eye of the Storm that was often sought by the Acolytes as well as how he found it best to get there through meditation.

  By this time, I had already been working with Zazen for about a week, and while the colors and rough shapes are starting to come together more smoothly, I still have not been able to generate that star-ship that will take me to the “Eye of the Storm” so that I might come to a better sense of power within myself. It’s a slow process, but I believe that I am improving.

  When I find that the Zazen meditations are not working in the way that I would hope…I have also taken to practicing other forms of meditation as well. In my blog (that I recently updated), I have taken a fnndness for Jadus’ “Rage Meditations” in learning to better control my anger and energies so that I am not lashing out and expending all my energy in a few blows (compare it to the Hulk when I lose my temper…but then, once I have expended all my energy, I am then completely drained, leaving myself vulnerable).

  These meditations have given me time to reflect on the very memories and feelings that first brought me to wonder of the Dark Side in the first place…it has given me a chance to consider what was truly weak and what was merely an opportunity for strength in hiding, like a wolf in sheep’s clothing. Still, that is what I have gotten from my 15 days of meditations.

  2.       Sith Stare:
  In between meditations, I found that I could also work on the other parts of lesson 2 that were not as time consuming. I started (of course) with the SITH stare. One thing that I like about this exercise was the sense of power I got…even when focusing my gaze on an inanimate objects (for practice on focus), I could feel the energies slithering from body and constricting around whatever it was that I set my gaze on…I was always told by others that I could have quite the intimidating stare.

  [[The rest of this passage went on to explain a story about me trying out the Sith Stare on animals and humans. Again, this was all done in the voice of my guise, and the whole thing was a complete lie. I mean, I tried the Sith Stare on some friends and such, and I always won…but there was nothing significant about it. They were just dumb staring contests between two people with an intimidating gaze. I don’t want to scare people away from me, so, I just made up some really impressive story and added it to my entry. I mean, it got approved, so it’s not like they actually make sure that you’re doing what you’re told.]]
  3.       Self-Reprogramming:

  For self-reprogramming, I decided to kick out junk food. It may seem strange to you, but I have a rather bad habit of eating unhealthy since my partner left for the military. It was something that had been taken from me while she was home because she needed to stay at weight for BMT, and so, out of rebellion, it was one of the many bad habits I came back to after she left in April.

  It was tough since Hostess had just gone under and everything was being bought at rapid paces because we would never see those types of snacks ever again (or so we thought). It was true torture not to go and buy one box of everything before they disappeared from the shelves…but somehow…through pure will power, I held strong to my Pledge, and never strayed from the Assignment.

  4.       Body Mastery:
  There are many things that I have been doing for body mastery. I have grown somewhat lazy in my time since I first played Airsoft, was training with my soldier friend, and decided to be healthy. So, the first thing I did was pick up Taz’s old PT manual and have at it.
  I started going to the gym connected to my apartment complex and started lifting weights. I bought resistance tubes to build up my arm muscles at home, I started running through all elements of the winter weather (the cold, the snow, the rain, and the hail), increasing my distance each day.

  I also signed up for some martial arts classes to learn some Krav Maga and refresh myself on military hand-to-hand combat. I have been doing this now for 2 weeks. How is that for body mastery?

  5.       Fear Mastery:
  As I mentioned before (in the first passage)…my greatest fear is not being aware of what is going on around me at all times. I’m the type of person to sleep with one eye open because of the things I have experienced throughout my life.

  So…for fear mastery, I really put myself to the test. It started out with a normal hike/run through a nature park where I generally go to jog. I took a different trail than usual…one that required climbing hills, and the one where the path became faint and hard to follow the deeper you went into the forest. It was the “path less traveled” which finally led me to the deepest part of the woods where there were multiple things against me. Coyotes, Snakes, Venomous insects, many types of poison plants, hunters that could mistake me for a deer, ACTUAL deer…the kind that will kill anything that treads into its territories. Anything could happen.

  But, I waited until sunset…put on a blinder, put in some ear-buds to shut out the noise, sat in the middle of this forest and waited. I could see nothing, hear nothing…and the only thing with me now were my senses of smell and touch. I remember breaking out into a cold sweat, and everything in me was screaming to stop because I could not stand to be so open…so vulnerable like this. But, finally my watch beeped at me (I could feel it vibrate)…it had been an hour, and I was done. I lifted the blindfold and found that nothing had dared disturb me during this process of meditation through nothingness.

  But I feel stronger through this experience and look forward to new trials.
  “I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain.”

  ————————————————————————————–

[[And this is where we will leave it for Part 1 // will soon be continued in Part 2 ]]

Feeling Lost

A part of me is feeling rather lost as of late.
I blame this on all sorts of different things as I try and find myself and my path. I guess I should start with the simple stuff and really work my way down to the more difficult situations. I mean, that seems like the more logical thing to do anyways.

…the first thing that has me down is my severe depression. Recently, I made the move to Germany, and it was not at all what I expected. Here I had been saving up money since before August of 2012, and things were so difficult. There was the matter of getting a job transfer, a work contract, all my medical and personal documents, saving the money for passports, vaccinations, and other things needed before traveling. Finally when I had my flight date all planned out, things were supposed to go smoothly.
I already had an apartment set aside for me to rent, had my job contact so I could get my visa. It was all supposed to flow so smoothly so that I could begin my work in no time and begin this new life with my partner.

But…when I got to Germany, that first night I found out that I was homeless. My apartment had been taken back by the landlord, and I had no place to go. I ended up staying at a military base in Ansbach (even though I wasn’t supposed to be there), and that’s where I hit another rut. I thought that staying at the base meant I could get my visa…well, no. I couldn’t. Turns out my job needed more documents from me than what they originally had said…and also, I could not get my visa without a valid address. It was madness. So, back to square one, had to find an apartment near Augsburg…I finally found one in Neusass, and at last, things are finally on track.

I’m currently waiting to hear back about my visa…but…what has me down is the aspect of ‘work’. I know I need to work because I’m out of money. I have been living off of soups and cheap fruits for over a month now and it’s not really healthy. I know I need to work so I can go to places like Rome and the Cinderella Castle with Taz. But, it’s because of work that I will see Taz even less, and I know it’s going to ruin this grand illusion of my moving to Germany even more. Allow me to elaborate.
Since coming to Germany, I have been many places and seen many things. But, vacationing is one thing, whereas living here is something else. Because I am not fluent in the language, I am so out of place and an outcast. I barely have any friends (none that I can hang out with) and I just feel so alone. I hated my job in the States, and I’ll have the same job here in Germany only with a crappier work schedule, less pay, and in a place that I heard was a really bad facility. So naturally, I’m worried. I am glad that I came here to be with Taz…but the majority of me is just ready to come back home with her, back to where things seemed less complicated. Also the fact that I hang in limbo with my visa being approved has me stressed out as well.

—

Now about my path…

I started the Jedi path a little while ago in 2012. I truly believe I got into it maybe April or May. Still, it was something that I connected with, something I could truly relate to, focus on, and work with as far as a lifestyle and path. But still, there were parts I held conflict with, parts that where I felt that there was something missing (this same thing happened to me when I was Wiccan). So, later in that same year (around October and maybe sooner)…I started looking into the Darker Aspect of The Force. I moved away from Jedi-Realism to look into Sithism instead.

Sithism was not at all as bad as I thought it was going to be. At the Sith Academy, I also found myself drawn in by things that I could relate to and work with. I was moved by Darth Imperius’ vision given to him by Omega and of the prospect of a Dark Side Lamacracy. But, I would never admit it to them at the Academy…I never abandoned the Jedi-way. I just merely started mixing the two aspects together. Forming a Shadow-Jedi of sorts.

Recently though…Sith Academy has started to fall apart. Whereas it used to be a strong school of many members all looking to better themselves in many different areas of study, now, it’s an empty shell of people that can no longer decide what they believe in. My time there has advanced me in Ranks to the title of “Lord” (just one step below Darth which is highest ranking). I have 3 apprentices learning under me…and now, out of the blue, Darth Imperius has come out of his long silence and admitted that we are all…well…basically stupid. The man who is the face and vision of Sith Academy claimed that he lied of his vision, lied of Omega, and said we were all fools for believing in something like The Force because it could not be proven. He said that we needed to be more logical…and he spoke of reaching out to business partners and organizations to make certain technologies available to us, and to move away from a religion to more of a…study group? In one blog post he has basically taken all that we once stood for and pushed it under the rug, smashed us underneath his boot…and I do not like it. I honestly feel like Lord Venger and I are the only ones who truly know what we believe and what direction we are supposed to be heading anymore. And I guess…I guess all this has just had me all confused and full of doubts.

I am Shadow Jedi…
I believe in The Force…both the good and bad aspects…I draw power and wisdom from that grey area in between the light and the dark. I believe this path has made me stronger, wiser, and has enlightened me in many ways and in many things. I still plan on continuing my training at both Sith Academy and IJRS…but still. The fact that I was called foolish…for all my beliefs and the things I have achieved…I’m insulted, I’m hurt. I am bothered and I don’t know why I fear losing those under me. I fear the loss of the Academy as it hold so much promise, so much to give and to teach that it breaks my heart seeing it fall apart like this.

And lastly…I’m hurt because I have led myself down this path, I got too involved with something that is now letting me down to the point where I want to give up on everything and go back to that “Hermit phase” where I felt that I needed not religion or a certain lifestyle in order to lead a happy life.

But no…no…see, therein lies the problem. I know I need something because my heart tells me there is a place where all these things fit in. My heart has always told me that this grey and neutral aspect of The Force is what I need. I guess what I need right now is motivation, encouragement…something.

Something to pull me out of this hole and get me back on track.

—Padawan Nyati Grey
—Sith Lord Larken